Allow me to introduce myself and share a bit of my story with you. For 23 years, I endured Domestic Abuse and Coercive Control, and it profoundly affected my life.

When I finally plucked up the courage to escape, I realised very quickly that life was not how I had anticipated it to be. The journey that I had yet to go on was to be a long, hard battle.

It dawned on me that I didn’t know who I was any more, I didn’t have a clue how to move forward,       and why?.... because for years I had been told what to do, how to act, who to speak to, how to dress, to the point where I constantly doubted myself and my decisions. I was confused and overwhelmed.

On one hand I felt elated, free and excited but the other side, was a darker, empty space that was scary. I slept in my car as I feared staying in one place for too long. I was paranoid that people were looking at me, judging me and talking behind my back. Listening to the juicy gossip and lies that ‘he’ continued to spread.

I gave up my job as I didn’t feel safe there. Money was running low and I had a divorce to organise and a house to sell. My kids were young adults but that didn’t stop the battle they faced daily. I felt guilty, they didn’t know their own mother but they remained supportive and for that I will be forever grateful.

Enough was enough, after about a year I enlisted the help of a Psychologist. She asked me what I wanted out of our sessions and I simply replied. I need you to be firm and tell me what to do. I’ve wasted a whole year faffing around and I’ve achieved nothing.

I remember she smiled at me and said. I will never tell you what to do, that is what you have to work out for yourself. But….. I WILL help you on that journey. We had lots of work to do and some of the sessions I found myself wondering how on earth the exercises would help, but I continued to trust the process and before long I started to see results.

I was fortunate enough to be able to afford these weekly sessions, but it bothered me that not everyone would be able to choose this option. I vowed there and then, that if I ever had the opportunity, I would create a way that any survivor could get the help they needed at a price they could afford!.

Fast forward a few years and here we are, The Survivor Programme. I am no professional when it comes to designing a course, but to keep the cost as low as possible, I’ve attempted it all by myself. Another tick box.

I may not be a professional web/programme designer but I do have the knowledge, experience and qualifications to have put this course together.

So just how far have I come. It is still a working progress as new situations pop up all the time, but I now have the tools and skills to deal with each one as they come. Just like anybody else does. I also keep a little reminder in those hard moments….

This is MY photo… You may have one too?

My daughter in Law took this, just a few weeks before I left. The toll of all those years is evident.

I was underweight, anorexic, sleep-deprived, exhausted, and in constant pain.

I carry this photo in my purse as a reminder, of how far I have come and to never return to that vulnerable state again.

In just a few months of seeing my therapist, I started to rebuild my life.

I slowly began socializing and eating again. I enrolled in the Police and finally had my own income. I was then able to secure a place to stay for myself and my sons.

My past was slowly fading and my confidence and self worth was growing.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not perfect, who is?! BUT, I am ME. And that’s what counts, I am Happy being me and this is where I would love to help you get to.

I have since left the Police, found a fantastic and supportive partner and am now a fully qualified Cognitive Behavioural Hypnotherapist.

Now, I am in a place where I can guide others through this journey of discovery and healing. No one should face this alone. While gaining freedom is a significant step, I quickly realized that resuming life after 23 years was not simple, but it IS possible. And here I am Happy and healthy and looking forward ….not back.

A world of difference between photos